RE-MADE

The One with The CSA Box Part 1

pgprincess — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 23:02:57 +0000

I am on the hunt for ways to be raw and save the budget. There are many helpful suggestions out there and some that I simply refuse to try. There are actually people who go dumpster diving, beg for veggies at the back of a grocery store…I’m so cool on that. Most suggest growing and sprouting yourself. Valiant efforts, but I just don’t have the time. I am, however, all about supporting local farmers, and living in Los Angeles, there are plenty to go around. I’m also a nosey little bugger, so when I read Kristen going on about her CSA box…I had to check it out. Turns out, there’s something like that RIGHT in my town and they have a drop off every Tuesday! A full box of produce for $20! According to my budget, I have about $25-$35 to spend on food, which I have routinely been exceeding. Also, with me juicing, I use a lot more produce than most. Hey, I’m willing to try. So, next Tuesday I will give the review on how good or bad it is.

Stay tuned.

The One With Maca Manna

pgprincess — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 17:36:30 +0000

Going raw can be a lot of things. It can be life changing. It can be expensive. It can be redundant. It can be whatever you shape it to be. In an effort to make sure I don’t get bored and that I do have some “comfort” foods, the one big purchase I make is Maca Manna. It ‘s a chocolate spread that can be mixed in smoothies or on crackers or taken alone. I make a little “pop” of it and cover a tablespoon of Maca Manna with some bee pollen. This gives me the kick of energy I need to get up in the morning. It’s also a great reason to have chocolate for breakfast! However, at $22 for 10 oz, I use it sparingly and cut back elsewhere in my budget, lol.

The One with The Oranges!

pgprincess — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 00:12:08 +0000

For a minute I am cooling it on the Master Cleanser. I just get the hint from my body that it’s not in the mood to do it, lol. However, that is not an excuse to eat everything in site…otherwise known as “what I’ve been doing”. I stocked up on some fruits and veggies and am prepared to drink juice until dinner, then have a salad for dinner. I did buy some fish to eat for dinner with a little quinoa, but I think I will save the fish for the weekend. As I am fleshing out my goals and plans, I wanted to share a bit of information. We all know I am also trying to dig myself out of a financial hole. So, I can’t be juicing the whole store on my little budget. In steps SPROUTS! Sprouts is also known as Henry’s, depending on where you live. And it could be known as something else wherever you are. However, this week, Sprouts has Valencia Oranges for 19 CENTS a piece!!!! I got 30 oranges for $3.00!!! When you are juicing, oranges are one of the base juices so I was super stoked at this.

Juicing and being healthy can be done on a budget, but you have to utilize your resources!

The One with The Ah-Ha Moment

pgprincess — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 23:55:23 +0000

I must admit. I have not been a subscriber of this moment. I am not an avid Oprah follower and although I have had many epiphanies, there hasn’t really been anything SOUL shaking. That was until the other day. I was talking to my roommate about my weight loss struggle and the topic of embarrassment came to mind.

Let me go back a little. I had a conversation with a guy I recently stopped dating that went something like this:

ME: “I just realized I have been such a coward. Fear has stopped me from attending all the things I am invited to.”

HIM: “Things like?”

ME: “Weddings, reunions, beach parties, birthday parties, dates, release parties, wrap parties…”

HIM: “Well, I can understand the beach parties, seeing other girls in 2-pieces, but why don’t you wanna go to anything else?”

ME: “This conversation is over.”

WTF?? First, I am DONE with guys from California. Not only are the insensitive and rather daft, but they just don’t GET ME!

Back to the convo with my roomie. She is doing her thang as far as getting the weight off and bully for her! We were talking about why we were so anxious to get the weight off and we both said at the same time: “I’m not used to NOT being the baddest chick in the room!!!”

See, homeboy thought that I would be jealous of the other chicks because they would be (temporarily) cuter sexier in a better position than me. But that’s not it! I am not a jealous person. I couldn’t care less what another chick is wearing. And while I am not jealous, I am selfish. Growing up and even into college one could ascertain that I was the baddest chick in the room. Even on a slightly bloated day I would be amongst the top 5. However, 1 move to California and 50 extra pounds takes you down a few notches socially. He assumed that I would be uncomfortable at a place where I would be expected to show my body. Not entirely true. I am uncomfortable showing ANYONE my body, ESPECIALLY people who have seen it smaller. WHY? Because I wouldn’t get any attention! I wouldn’t be the baddest chick in the place. And that’s not taking away from any other chick there. No homo, but I can spot out the BC in a room and kudos to her. There is not so much envy as there are thoughts of “while I’m working out I wanna picture her legs,” or “lemme put back some of this food, cause she’s only eating the veggies around the chicken wings.” I don’t wanna go out because I am not getting the attention I want.

It has often been stated that someone will only make a change if the stakes are high enough. Well, we have just reached it. I have always considered myself a social butterfly, and now that this weight has clipped my wings, it HAS TO GO! I am going on a cruise in January…and I need to be the BADDEST CHICK ON THE BOAT or at least among them.

I am currently on Day 4 of a 30 day Bikram Yoga challenge (to myself). I need to lose roughly 80lbs to get to my goal and I have 5 months to do it! That’s only 16lbs per month!!! DOABLE!

The One With The Court Date

pgprincess — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 23:24:49 +0000

At first glance, I am a good girl. At second, third and fourth I’m not half bad either, but I have done some bad things. None of which should have landed me standing in a God awful line outside of the Hill Street courthouse awaiting my appearance. My license has been allegedly suspended for some time now. Years actually. And while yes, I probably shouldn’t be driving…I have places to go! And it’s not like I am out there all willy nilly with no sense of direction. I don’t get into many accidents and I know what I’m doing.

Long story short, I walked away with another court date a few weeks from today (another day off of the new job…this can’t be) and a price tag of $1400 to get a ticket off of my license and get my license off of suspension. Yes, I know, I know. There goes my emergency fund, any semblance of savings and a few other projects I had lined up. But if all goes well, I won’t have to do any jail time and I won’t piss in my seat every time I see a cop behind me.

The One With the Pyramid

pgprincess — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 20:48:50 +0000

Coming across Maslov’s hierarchy of needs was intended to give me insight into personal finance goals. However, it quickly brought to light what is causing so much frustration in not only my personal goals in life, but my dating life as well. I am currently dating a typical LA guy. When I say typical, I mean a Harley riding, sailor cussing, NWA loving, ’64 driving (well, not really, but he loves them), non-degree holding dude. While he is attractive enough himself, he cares more about the woman he dates being more attractive. Los Angeles is filled with pretty women, most of whom never wake up that way. However, the men here follow a dating decorum that makes me throw up a little in my mouth. If she’s skinny, take her out to eat and f**k her. If she’s fat, he’ll f**k her after the meal with the skinny chick.

So, why am I still dating this guy? Good question. Let’s put aside the fact that subconsciously my low self esteem from being overweight has caused me to believe that I don’t deserve better. Epiphany.

I have been trying to understand this man’s behavior. Somehow thinking that if he was really into me…he would change. He wouldn’t want to bang every short skirt roaming the streets (which he claims he doesn’t, I believe him, but he’s getting antsy). As I am working on remaking my life, I realized that I am all over the pyramid. I’m JUST acquiring the physiological, but also trying to get the esteem. One level at a time.

So I’m looking at this guy. I notice on the pyramid…very low on the pyramid is sex. Higher up on it is sexual intimacy. Now, I know the adage about not being able to change a person, and I get that. I do feel that you can influence behavior…but what you CANNOT change is a person’s hierarchy of needs within themselves. After many conversations with him, he is a Level 2…at the most! And he seems pretty happy there. Bummer.

The irony of the situation is that my financial and physical setbacks have him doubting my “The One”ness…however, once those are no longer an issue…does he have the foresight to realize I will then be out of his league?

The One Where He’s One In A Million

pgprincess — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 18:44:26 +0000

So, a few of you know that i joined match.com in an effort to meet new men in Los Angeles. While surfing the search a tiny thumbnail jumped out at me. HE IS GORGEOUS! Beautiful smile, satin complexion…but at 6’7…he requests a match a wee bit taller than my 5’3 self. BUMMER.

So, a feature that match.com has is the “see more like him” link. I eagerly left click into my future and come up with a nice message that reads:

Sorry, no other profiles like [his name] can be found;
[his name] is one in a million!

Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle!!! NO SHIT! It would be MY luck that the one guy who could make my heart race via a computer screen is one in a million. Thanks match, you’ve now only made him more attractive and even more out of my reach.

The One Where She Negotiates a Salary

pgprincess — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 00:31:24 +0000

For a while there things got bleak. I was out of work, trying to start a massage business with NO money and my unemployment was cut off with a nice bill for an $8775 repayment. I was down…but certainly not out. In a last ditch effort I sent me resume out to everyone I could using various websites including CalJobs (where I found my current position, don’t sleep). I ended up being contacted by a temp agency (Ajilon) who sent me out quite regularly. They were nice, prompt and dependable. I got placed at a market research company super close to my house while the current receptionist was on vacation.

I secretly prayed that she be eaten by a shark, get knocked up or jest say eff it and not come back. Call it prayer, karma or thought if you want, but they kept calling me back and one day I came in and all of her personal things had vanished. HOT DAMN! Luckily for me, the stress of looking for someone new wasn’t as appealing as hiring what’s here. So, one day I got called into the office and was asked what I wanted to make.

Hmmmm. Though some of you may already have an answer in your head, I honestly didn’t know. Humbling. I really didn’t know my worth. How much I needed to get by. When did I turn into such an “I’ll take what I can get” chick? Epiphany. She was growing impatient and I meekly blurted out a number. She nodded and said, “Ok, that’s around what we were thinking.” Immediately I wish I had asked for some time to think. I allowed someone else to rush a HUGE decision. I’d fallen for the trick. The okey doke. Bamboozled.

I did two things that night. I started thinking with a money mind and thinking of a way to resubmit my offer. Sigh. I check personal finance website ON THE DAILY…I’m SO about this right now. After tallying up all of my expenses, savings plans, debt repayment (arg! @ EDD) and vacation plans…I came up with a number.

I waited for the right moment, during a conversation about my future to say, “Hey, remember when you asked me how much I wanted? Well, I’ve been thinkin…”

Result: While I didn’t get the number I was looking for, they did meet me in the middle with something I can live with. I am glad I spoke up and didn’t chicken out.

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no ones definition of your life. Define yourself.”
~Harvey Fierstein ~

The One Where She Went To The Gym Anyway

pgprincess — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 23:22:01 +0000

While this week has been great as far as the cleanse. Financially I am getting it together and the Master Cleanse is going ok. I have been working out at lunch everyday this week and am feeling great! However, the manfriend went on a boy’s trip to Vegas and came back TRIPPIN’! So, as I spend a few days trying to distance myself from him, and reeling from my match.com diss, I find myself on today with too much on my mind. I DO NOT want to go to the gym. Normally, when faced with such opposition, I would simply choose not to go. BUT, since my old ways got me to well over 200lbs and still single, I decided to hightail it to the gym anyway and work it out.

What was the real difference in my choice? What ultimately cause me to choose the gym? I had to step back and realize that I didn’t feel like working out while sitting in my chair. That’s great, I don’t have to work out in my chair. So, get out of the chair and go into the elevator. Nope, don’t feel like working out there either. Interestingly enough, I didn’t have an inkling to sweat it out in my car, or the garage, or the lobby, or the locker room. HOWEVER… once I put first foot on the elliptical, and started moving my feet and the beat from my iPod shuffle began to match the beat of my heart, there was no turning back. I got in my 20 minutes and felt GREAT afterward.

What’s the lesson? I allowed my future to interrupt my present. They cannot exist together or you won’t get anything done. Whatever your goal, do it in the present and let the future handle itself..

Matthew 6:34

“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

The One She Shouldn’t Have Closed

pgprincess — Tue, 18 May 2010 18:17:48 +0000

Years ago I checked my credit report and found the only line in good standing was a Lord & Taylor credit card. Now, at the time, I didn’t remember ever opening a Lord & Taylor account. Something in me tells me I worked there, but only for a spell, or that I opened an account just to get a percentage off of something, but I don’t remember receiving the hard card, or even purchasing items there frequently. I thought I had become a victim of identity theft…but the payment was on time and there was no balance. Freaked out and trying to do what was “best” without actually asking anyone (I didn’t even know who to ask) I called Lord & Taylor, thinking I was being responsible, and I closed the account. I closed it. Fast forward 12 years and I run across an article on Quizzle telling me that I should have kept it open. Basically, I just got rid of a 12 year old good account. Being that I have NO OTHER accounts in good standing, I had erased my credit history. While it wouldn’t have made my score skyrocket, it would have improved it a little by showing that I have some history. Oh, well, time to clean up the spilled milk, I’m done crying over it.